I know I keep saying this, but I still don't properly get it. It's starting to creep on me, though -- my brother and I were visiting Mum today and I realised it was one of the last times I'll see them for a while. I also gave the cats extra cuddles even though I'll see them again too!
Things I've still got to do:
- print off my plane tickets
- print off my train tickets
- print off a map from a train station in Warrington to another train station in Warrington (long story, more later)
- buy an external hard drive
- tidy/empty my flat
- make sure I've got all the required documents ready
- "practise" packing
- actually pack
Not that much, actually. Most of the paperwork is done, which is the hardest/most annoying part. I'm trying to get the first half of the list above crossed out by tomorrow evening.
I'm a bit scared. It feels like the time is ticking only towards the departure and then my life would just magically end, even though some parts of it will only start then. I'm scared of saying goodbye (even if it's temporary), and I'm scared of crying when I do say goodbye. "Luckily", it seems like I will go to the airport alone without an entourage to take pictures and bid me farewell, because I picked a silly time to travel and everyone will be at work. I'm not sure how I feel about that. I'd like to have someone there because I might feel a bit pathetic going alone, but it will be so much easier to leave when I'm not leaving someone else on their own. I won't feel the need to linger and say bye for the hundredth time, I can just go through the security and get everything over and done with.
Now I need to distract myself so I don't start feeling bad. :P Here's a strawberry pie that my brother and I made for Mum's birthday today (her birthday was yesterday though):
It was really tasty! We very nearly ate the whole pie (him, me, and Mum! Not just him and me!), but fortunately there was still some left for Mum for tomorrow or whenever she wants to eat it.
I don't want to say goodbye. I'm feeling a bit gloomy about it because it's dark and late, but there are so many things I'm looking forward to and I know that it'll be a fantastic year abroad! There will be a few difficult things before it, but as my mum said, once I get there I'll be so distracted by all the new things that I won't even have the chance to feel homesick. I hope she's right. She usually is.
Viikko armonaikaa ja vähän pelonsekaiset tunnelmat tällä hetkellä. No, ei varsinaisesti pelota, mutta en tosiaankaan odota innolla sitä, kun näen tutut ihmiset viimeistä kertaa ja pitää sanoa hyvästit hetkeksi. Se on kaikkein vaikein asia tässä koko lähdössä, ainakin nyt tuntuu siltä. Onneksi en kuitenkaan lähde niin kauas, ja tulenhan kuitenkin joululomalla taas käymään. Vähän outoa, että tällaisia edes mietin, kun olen kuitenkin matkustanut itsekseni ja muutenkaan en ole sellainen ihminen, jonka pitäisi koko ajan olla toisten ihmisten seurassa. On kyllä aika kivaa järjestellä asioita, siivota ja pakata (tai no, katsotaan sitten...), mutta sitä viimeistä päivää Suomessa en kyllä odota. Tulipas aika masentavaa tekstiä, mutta johtuu varmaan myöhäisestä kellonajasta. Mansikkapiiras oli aivan mahtavan hyvää (vaikka itse sanonkin)!
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